Establish a common understanding;
machismo |məˈ ch ēzmō; -ˈkēz-|
noun
strong or aggressive masculine pride.
• [figurative] daring or bravado
Before you start to conjure up notions of Stanley Kowalski, acquiesce with me in an alternative archetype.
Tony Soprano was a brilliantly developed character in The Sopranos. While many were tuning in to indulge their fetish for American gangster portrayals, a complex statement was being made about modern interdiction of virility. Viewers were presented a frame from which to experience and perceive Tony Soprano – Dr. Melfi, an intelligent, rational, and relatable psychiatrist who treats Tony. In an episode from Season 3 titled Employee of the Month, Dr. Melfi is jumped one evening while getting into her car. She is dragged into a stairwell and raped. A mishandling of the evidence collected allows for the rapist to be released despite the fact that she can identify him. She later ventures out for a meal only to see his picture posted as the Employee of the Month at the diner. I found genuine anger rising inside while I watched the rape scene. I was furious that there wasn’t a last minute rescue, a chance interruption, anything. I was deeply compelled to do something and equally frustrated that there was nothing I could do. Sure it is just a show but this really happens, too.
There are several males in this episode who are portraying typical men in our lives. First, Dr. Melfi’s ex-husband was on the phone with her minutes before the attack. He’s an Italian male, like Tony, but one who openly distances himself from the bold masculinity Tony portrays. He denounces Tony’s behaviors, marginalizing him to being nothing more than a criminal. In fact, he stops short of grouping Tony in with the rapist. After the incident, her ex (sc. Richard LaPenna) races to her side offering comforting words and consolation. He stands back and lets law enforcement do their job collecting evidence. Dr. Melfi’s son comes storming in cursing and acting out, swearing vengeance. As he does, his parents placate him with lofty lectures of rational behavior and civility. His righteous rage is diminished; he is infantalized, treated like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. We all know before her son leaves the room he isn’t going to take action. He’s been broken down so many times that it is hard to tell if he ever had any fight in him at all. Perfectly raised to be a pacifistic boy living out the machinations of what a man might be. After hearing that the rapist will be released due to a mishandling of the evidence along the chain of custody, the father finally breaks from his mantra of rational and civil obedience to put on a show for Dr. Melfi. He unconvincingly tells her what horrible things he would do with his bare hands if he were to encounter the rapist. His pseudo-masculine posture fades as his fists release from being clenched. He returns to the broken pacifist. “Once I killed him, they’d probably throw me in jail for what I did to that scum.” He scoffs. How easy it is to talk tough.
The truth to the whole scenario was evident to the clever viewers the moment the rape scene initiated at Dr. Melfi’s car – if Tony Soprano had been there that guy would have been sorry. Later in the episode Dr. Melfi represents Tony as a Rotweiler in her dream. Which is probably f0r the same reason so many people keep dogs as pets. There’s that element of protection there. Somehow they miss that a man is capable of unconditional love and an animalistic savagery, too. I’ve been pushed and bullied in plenty of ways in my life and I’ve seen the difference between men who really are fighters and men who posture as fighters. I’ve been through combat with both and let me tell you, one will save your life and the other will get you killed. While people are crying foul everytime machismo is portrayed openly, everytime violence is discussed, I hear a lion’s roar deep within because I know that if I had a problem with it, I wouldn’t be crying about it- I’d do something about it.
When you consider that it could be you or one of your loved ones in Dr. Melfi’s situation, how do you wish it would turn out? Perhaps you wish you could wish for someone like Tony to come swooping in making that evil doer pay. The problem is, this is a world of laws and we must respect them, right? Let me be clear, this initial introduction of my machismo is to help you understand what American machismo really is. You’ve seen the old westerns, read of the frontier. The real men weren’t outwardly raising hell. They were quietly studying the system carving their own way until they were called to action. Then you saw the difference. American machismo has been evolving. It’s quiet. The sad thing is that few people really know a person like I’m describing. In the course of my posts, you’ll read my exploits in my memoirs. You’ll find posts dedicated to machismo. Sprinkled along will be some of my musings, too. I am an American man. I’m an alpha male. That’s more than an A type personality. You’ll come to know the difference.
mahavee
